April 2012
3 posts
1 tag
The Strange People
The antelope are strange people … they are beautiful to look at, and yet they are tricky. We do not trust them. They appear and disappear; they are like shadows on the plains. Because of their great beauty, young men sometimes follow the antelope and are lost forever. Even if those foolish ones find themselves and return, they are never again right in their heads.             —Pretty...
Apr 23rd
2 notes
1 tag
from What can I hold you with?
I can give you my loneliness, my darkness, the hunger of my heart; I am trying to bribe you with uncertainty, with danger, with defeat. Jorge Luis Borges
Apr 20th
1 note
1 tag
Making a Fist
For the first time, on the road north of Tampico, I felt the life sliding out of me, a drum in the desert, harder and harder to hear. I was seven, I lay in the car watching palm trees swirl a sickening pattern past the glass. My stomach was a melon split wide inside my skin. “How do you know if you are going to die?” I begged my mother. We had been traveling for days. With strange...
Apr 14th
3 notes
March 2012
4 posts
1 tag
from March
Don’t leave now. We have almost survived our lives. Linda Pastan
Mar 30th
5 notes
1 tag
from Her my body
I have one way to be happy and she is that way. I would like to fly with her to Brussels. We would not be put off by the drool. This is what happens when people sleep. We would buy postcards of the little boy who saved Brussels when he peed on a fire. We would be romantic in public places. For the moment these desires can best be furthered by petting a dog. I’m also working on this...
Mar 15th
1 tag
To the Couple Lingering on the Doorstep
Quit kissing beneath my window. The day turns shady as you lean feeding, feeding. Night arrives, red-gold and windless and still you persist. I’ve had enough slobber and gush. And let me say this: the problem with passion isn’t that it doesn’t last but that it does, and you’ll find yourself alone in a room, blistered and husky-voiced, watching the side of your building turn...
Mar 8th
1 tag
from On the Old Way
                                        and the sleepless night travels along through the day as it once did over and over for this was the way almost home almost certain that it was there almost believing that it could be everything in spite of everything W.S. Merwin
Mar 2nd
February 2012
3 posts
1 tag
Meditation from 14A
And what if the passage out of this life is like a flight from Seattle to St. Louis— the long taxi out of the body, the brief and terrible acceleration, the improbable buoyancy, and then the moment when, godlike, you see the way things fit together: the grave and earnest roads with their little cars, stitching their desires with invisible thread; the tiny pushpin houses and backyard...
Feb 24th
1 tag
The Kiss
When he finally put his mouth on me—on my shoulder—the world shifted a little on the tilted axis of itself. The minutes since my brother died stopped marching ahead like dumb soldiers and the stars rested. His mouth on my shoulder and then on my throat and the world started up again for me, some machine deep inside it recalibrating, all the little wheels slowly...
Feb 17th
2 notes
1 tag
The Dark Sooner
Then came the darker sooner, came the later lower. We were no longer a sweeter-here happily-ever-after. We were after ever. We were farther and further. More was the word we used for harder. Lost was our standard-bearer. Our gods were fallen faster, and fallen larger. The day was duller, duller was disaster. Our charge was error. Instead of leader we had louder, instead of lover,...
Feb 4th
January 2012
2 posts
1 tag
The New Year
It is winter and the new year. Nobody knows you. Away from the stars, from the rain of light, you lie under the weather of stones. There is no thread to lead you back. Your friends doze in the dark of pleasure and cannot remember. Nobody knows you. You are the neighbor of nothing. You do not see the rain falling and the man walking away, the soiled wind blowing its ashes across the city....
Jan 22nd
3 notes
1 tag
from Atlantis
4. ATLANTIS I thought your illness a kind of solvent dissolving the future a little at a time; I didn’t understand what’s to come was always just a glimmer up ahead, veiled like the marsh gone under its tidal sheet of mildly rippling aluminum. What these salt distances were is also where they’re going: from blankly silvered span toward specificity: the curve of certain brave...
Jan 13th
3 notes
December 2011
4 posts
1 tag
Bow Down
I. As if he, too, could see the world, just in front of us, coming divided: those who step routinely toward a dark that, mostly, has seemed avoidable; those who let them—                                         World from which, if for no other reason, then out of pity, I should look away. Out of decency. I should try, or should seem to have tried, or to be about to. II. ...
Dec 26th
1 tag
from Body & Isn't
                                                                      The way maps affect time. For a second I think I feel the fleeting texture of your skin. Lumbar & sacral nerves descend to exits beyond the end of the cord. Keep the blood in at all costs, even when the wind crackles its cells. The coming of electricity, half next time & half this: My five. My unending ache at the...
Dec 16th
1 tag
Two Countries
Skin remembers how long the years grow when skin is not touched, a gray tunnel of singleness, feather lost from the tail of a bird, swirling onto a step, swept away by someone who never saw it was a feather. Skin ate, walked, slept by itself, knew how to raise a see-you-later hand. But skin felt it was never seen, never known as a land on the map, nose like a city, hip like a city,...
Dec 10th
4 notes
1 tag
from Be Near Me
When whatever you want to do cannot be done, When nothing is of any use; —At this hour when night comes down, When night comes, dragging its long face,                                                        dressed in mourning, Be with me, My tormenter, my love, be near me. Faiz Ahmed Faiz (translated by Naomi Lazard)
Dec 3rd
October 2011
2 posts
1 tag
One Continuous Substance
A small boy and a slant of morning light both exit the last dark trees of this forest, though the boy is gone in an instant. Not the light: it travels its famous 186,000 miles per second to be this still gold bar on the floor of the darkness. I suppose that from the universe’s point of view we do the same: a small boy and an old man being one continuous substance. We were making love...
Oct 21st
9 notes
1 tag
from Homage to Cy Twombly
This is how it works in children’s books, how most of what you know is reconstruction, something inferred from the shadow you catch in a mirror; and this is how it works in love and art; how, sometimes, the shape of the wind on an empty street is all you know of home: a field of rain or one last boat returning from the sound, the blown light on its deck sudden and large, no less a fact...
Oct 3rd
1 note
September 2011
3 posts
1 tag
from Epithalament
                                       Please, don’t lose me here. I am sorry my clutch is all tendon and no discipline: the heart is a severed kind of muscle and alone. I can hear yours in your room. I hear mine in another room. In another’s. Brenda Shaughnessy
Sep 26th
4 notes
1 tag
Against His Quitting the Torn Field
            Let him put his mouth in the             dust—there may yet be hope.                   Lamentations “How, entering, inside him, it became more easy to believe I would not breathe the same, it would not be my life, breathing, breathed —out, again, ever.” * There was a bird, once, like that. Or— Or, shorn of bird—call only— a calling-to that seemed it would never...
Sep 17th
1 tag
from Annunciation with a Garland of Self-Heal
                                    though standing in the gap between the world we’re born to and the world we almost but don’t quite invent                                                      what we know in our bones is how much mystery we need to make a world moment by moment                                  escaping                                                 and bound to return...
Sep 14th
August 2011
3 posts
1 tag
Absence
I speak to you across cities I speak to you across plains My mouth is upon your pillow Both faces of the walls come meeting My voice discovering you I speak to you of eternity O cities memories of cities Cities wrapped in our desires Cities come early cities come lately Cities strong and cities secret Plundered of their master’s builders All their thinkers all their ghosts ...
Aug 24th
1 tag
from The Silence
A conversation is overhead on a train, on an airplane, and even Love cannot know the whole. It sits in the row behind, listening quietly to what it is able. Then the green and red wing-lights blink out; the train rounds the track’s curve and is lost. Love, also disappearing, would like to tap the two murmuring ones on the shoulder. Love would like to say to them, “Speak more...
Aug 15th
1 note
1 tag
The Lovers
She is about to come. This time, they are sitting up, joined below the belly, feet cupped like sleek hands praying at the base of each other’s spines. And when something lifts within her toward a light she’s sure, once again, she can’t bear, she opens her eyes and sees his face is turned away, one arm behind him, hands splayed palm...
Aug 10th
1 note
July 2011
3 posts
1 tag
Failure of Communion
What is the space between, enclosing us in one united person, yet dividing each alone. Frail bridges cross from eye to eye, from flesh to flesh, from word to word: the net is gapped at every mesh, and this each human knows: however close our touch or intimate our speech, silences, spaces reach most deep, and will not close. Judith Wright
Jul 22nd
1 note
1 tag
Untitled
What is it, it does not move like love, it does not want to know, it does not want to stroke, unfold it does not even want to touch, it is more like an animal (not loving) a thing trapped, you move wounded, you are hurt, you hurt, you want to get out, you want to tear yourself out, I am the outside, I am snow and space, pathways, you gather yourself, your muscles clutch, you move...
Jul 10th
June 2011
4 posts
1 tag
from Oedipus on Mother’s Day
The only curse we have is love. Donald Illich
Jun 30th
1 tag
Godzilla In Mexico
Listen carefully, my son: bombs were falling over Mexico City but no one even noticed. The air carried poison through the streets and open windows. You’d just finished eating and were watching cartoons on TV. I was reading in the bedroom next door when I realized we were going to die. Despite the dizziness and nausea I dragged myself to the kitchen and found you on the floor. We hugged....
Jun 24th
1 note
1 tag
from Awake
                                        Nothing perilous had come to find us. What was ours was ours. Michael Heffernan
Jun 17th
17 notes
1 tag
Morning
I’ve got to tell you how I love you always I think of it on grey mornings with death in my mouth the tea is never hot enough then and the cigarette dry the maroon robe chills me I need you and look out the window at the noiseless snow At night on the dock the buses glow like clouds and I am lonely ...
Jun 10th
1 tag
from Pericardium
               your arms, where you’d been, before me, waiting For me, the way the body has always been waiting for the heart to sense It is housed, it is needed, it will not be harmed. Joanna Klink
Jun 3rd
2 notes
May 2011
4 posts
1 tag
For the Dead
I dreamed I called you on the telephone to say: Be kinder to yourself but you were sick and would not answer The waste of my love goes on this way trying to save you from yourself I have always wondered about the left-over energy, the way water goes rushing down a hill long after the rains have stopped or the fire you want to go to bed from but cannot leave, burning-down but not...
May 25th
2 notes
1 tag
from Travelling
Then recite the list of what you’ve learned to do without. It is stronger than prayer. Stephen Dunn
May 19th
1 note
1 tag
I See a Man
He has just had sex. I can tell by the way, when he notices his shadow ahead of him, broad, spilling over both curbs to the road he is walking down slowly, most of him wants to stop and, as if remembering, stand briefly at a kind of attention. He has just had sex, it’s unclear with whom. It was a man, it was a woman… it was the air, whose inconveniently wide-apart edges can be...
May 12th
5 notes
1 tag
Upon Request
That I love you, I want to finally have that written down, now that you ask. Because I love you and not just sometimes, given the four thousand days and nights. That it seems as if you hardly have grown older, that you sometimes gaze into the distance as if love struck, that your hands are still beautiful, further than this I’d rather not go. That I sometimes look for your cheek...
May 7th
April 2011
5 posts
1 tag
from From the Home Place
One does not have to turn to listen. Airborne at the middle ear, molecular, each damped and stronger sound prompts its allied hair-cell to fire. No more than a smear at first, the spell each sound is there for has its onset and rise, its temperings whose play across the membranes no one other repeats. Dispersed toward him with the rest from what he sees of her face, the silences...
Apr 23rd
1 tag
Song
You’re wondering if I’m lonely: OK then, yes, I’m lonely as a plane rides lonely and level on its radio beam, aiming across the Rockies for the blue-strung aisles of an airfield on the ocean. You want to ask, am I lonely? Well, of course, lonely as a woman driving across country day after day, leaving behind ...
Apr 21st
1 tag
Why I Did Not Make Love to Your Dead Body
Shouldn’t it be romantic         to think to take you     in that final, leaden state —slowed mercury? Yet,         coming upon your corpse     excited me not to love—but to something         akin to autism. I was a rock      that dream, swaying. No lie—I’ll         cradle you after      death if I am able, babble and coo into your neck         as if you were my ...
Apr 16th
1 tag
Modern Declaration
I, having loved ever since I was a child a few things, never having wavered In these affections; never through shyness in the houses of the rich or in the presence of clergymen having denied these loves; Never when worked upon by cynics like chiropractors having grunted or clicked a vertebra to the discredit of those loves; Never when anxious to land a job having diminished them by a conniving...
Apr 9th
1 tag
Sonnet XI
I crave your mouth, your voice, your hair. Silent and starving, I prowl through the streets. Bread does not nourish me, dawn disrupts me, all day I hunt for the liquid measure of your steps. I hunger for your sleek laugh, your hands the color of a savage harvest, hunger for the pale stones of your fingernails, I want to eat your skin like a whole almond. I want to eat the sunbeam flaring...
Apr 1st
March 2011
2 posts
1 tag
from Muchness
That’s how my heart is, I thought— it lies coiled up inside me, asleep, then springs out and shocks me with all its muchness. Tony Hoagland
Mar 25th
1 tag
For Jane
225 days under grass and you know more than I. they have long taken your blood, you are a dry stick in a basket. is this how it works? in this room the hours of love still make shadows. when you left you took almost everything. I kneel in the nights before tigers that will not let me be. what you were will not happen again. the tigers have found me and I do not care. Charles...
Mar 12th
February 2011
2 posts
1 tag
Parable
There was a saint once, he had but to ring across water a small bell, all manner of fish rose, as answer, he was that holy, persuasive, both, or the fish perhaps merely hungry, their bodies a-shimmer with that hope especially that hunger brings, whatever the reason, the fish coming unassigned, in schools coming into the saint’s hand and, instead of getting, becoming...
Feb 25th
1 tag
Six Apologies, Lord
I Have Loved My Horrible Self, Lord. I Rose, Lord, and I Rose, Lord, And I Dropt. Your Requirements, Lord. ‘Spite Your Requirements, Lord, I Have Loved The Low Voltage Of The Moon, Lord, Until There Was No Moon Intensity Left, Lord, No Moon Intensity Left For You, Lord. I Have Loved The Frivolous, The Fleeting, The Frightful Clouds. Lord, I Have Loved Clouds! Do Not Forgive Me, Do Not...
Feb 14th
1 note
January 2011
7 posts
1 tag
From the Devotions
          1. As if somewhere, away, a door had slammed shut. —But not metal; not wood. Or as when something is later remembered only as something dark in the dream: torn, bruised, dream-slow descending, it could be anything— tiling, clouds, you again, beautifully consistent, in no usual or masterable way      leaves, a woman’s shaken-loose throat, shattered eyes...
Jan 30th
1 tag
Four Evasions
Sitting in the car, houses & wind outside, three in the morning, windows obliterated by snow coats & arms around each other, hands cold, no place we can go unable to say how much I want you unable even to say I am unable * Not that there is nothing to be said but that there is too much: this cripples me, I watch with envy & desire, you speak so freely. * Tell me...
Jan 28th
1 tag
Muse
When I kiss you in all the folding places of your body, you make that noise like a dog dreaming, dreaming of the long run he makes in answer to some jolt to his hormones, running across landfills, running, running by tips and shorelines from the scent of too much, but still going with head up and snout in the air because he loves it all and has to get away. I have to kiss deeper and more...
Jan 22nd
1 note
1 tag
The White Road
I walked with you through the exact afternoon you gave me your hand, life seemed hard to establish above the high wall leaves trembled under the stronger invisible weight I could die for just one of those things we share and have no words for saying: stars cross paths at a frightful speed unmovable glaciers at long last shift and in the only way it can accompany you my heart beats and...
Jan 14th
1 tag
In The Kitchen
It’s right before you drive away: our limbs still warm with sleep, coffee sputtering out, the north wind, your hips pressing me hard against the table. I like it hard because I need to remember this. I want to say harder. How we must look to the road that’s gone, to the splayed morning of cold butter and inveterate greed. Light comes and goes in the field. Oranges in a bowl, garlic,...
Jan 8th
1 tag
Untitled
I’ve been a shit and I hate fucking you now because I love fucking you too much; what good’s the head of my cock inside you when my other head, the one with the brains, keeps thinking how fucked up everything is, how fucked I am to be fucking you and thinking these things which take me away from you when all I want is to be close to you but fuck you for letting me fuck you now...
Jan 7th